By The Husband
Having a two year old can sometimes be a challenge.
I don’t mean the old “I get up at 5am every day, because I can” routine, or the “Let me see if I can use the iPad to its full potential” quest, but what I mean is the “Give me something to write with and I will try it on any surface other than paper” spiel.
It so happened at our cottage the other day, that little Niki got his hands on a black Sharpie and quietly and stealthily proceeded to draw on the furniture. White furniture that is.
Now ordinarily this would not have been too much of a problem, since a vast stock of appropriate cleaning supplies for all occasions is maintained at our place. At the cottage there is almost nothing but a broom, some rags to mop the floor and mild soap. We are not here to clean after all…
With the upcoming visit of the grandparents in mind and not wanting to replace the furniture, I had to come up with something.
The first thing that came to mind was “orange solvent” – the essential oil made from orange peels and sold to dentists worldwide to clean almost every glue, resin or impression material used in a patients mouth. Unfortunately, I do not keep a bottle with me at all times, especially since I hate the smell of it. The peel of a tangerine didn’t do the job and no oranges were to be found.
I had hoped that maybe Birgit brought one of the perfumes I hate (the ones smelling like orange peel) but since I do detest them, she apparently left them at home where she wears them secretly, while I am out.
And then all the stories, backstories, info, and lectures on perfumes I am subjected to more or rather less voluntarily, paid off! The base of a perfume can be either oil or alcohol. Alcohol – the other secret dental weapon!
So did I clean the furniture? I sure did, pristine whiteness was restored and the house still smells really nice, but now I apparently have to buy a full bottle of Guerlain Angelique Noire as soon as possible and a furious and incredulous wife to contend with.
Editor’s Note: Having a 38 year old can sometimes be a challenge. Upon searching a little further, an alcoholic hand disinfectant could have been found in the kitchen, along with several cleaning supplies and Angelique Noire could have been spared, but alas, I will surely use this incident as leverage the next time we pass an exclusive Guerlain counter.